The Hiss and the Growl

The Untold Truth of the Feminine Flame

There is a sacred fire that lives in the belly of women — ancient, knowing, wild. But for centuries, we have been taught to smother it.

Smile. Be nice. Don’t make waves. Don’t get angry. Don’t be “too much.”
And slowly, generation after generation, the feminine was taught to suppress the very instinct that would protect her.

In the overculture, anger became synonymous with violence, rather than recognized as a sacred warning signal. Women learned to smile at the predator, to ignore their gut, to be polite in the face of danger.

We were trained out of our teeth. Out of our growl. Out of the primal wisdom of the wild woman within.

The Parable of the Snake and the Sage 

       from the The Gospel of Sri Ramakrishna

'There was once a serpent who lived at the edge of a village.
She guarded her space and struck only when necessary — protecting her den and keeping danger at bay.

One day, a wandering sage came through the village and, seeing the serpent poised in her power, said:
"Violence is not the way. You must do no harm."

The serpent, hearing the wisdom of the sage, took it to heart. She curled up and vowed to never strike again.

Over time, the children of the village noticed that the snake no longer defended herself. They began to throw stones at her. Kick her. Mock her.
Her scales became bruised. Her body grew weak. She began to starve, hiding in shadows.

Months later, the sage returned and found the serpent barely alive.
"What happened to you?" he asked.

Tears in her eyes, the serpent replied, "I followed your teaching. I did no harm."

The sage knelt beside her and whispered,

"I told you not to bite… but I never told you not to hiss."

The Wound of Silenced Anger

This is the wound that lives in so many women:

• We were told anger is unbecoming.

• We were shamed for expressing rage.

• We were told to be good, sweet, docile — even when harm was near.

And in that shaming, a vital tool was taken from us: the ability to hiss, to growl, to protect ourselves and those we love.

Healthy anger is not violence.
It is a message.
It is instinct.
It is the body's sacred alarm bell saying: "This is not safe."

What Healthy Anger Feels Like

• In the body: A surge of heat, a rise in the chest or throat, clenched fists or jaw. Not to lash out — but to mobilize.

• In the psyche: A line drawn. A voice rising. A sense of “No more.”

• In the soul: A reclamation. A return of power. The fire that says, “I am not prey. I am not here to please.”

The Role of the Fierce Feminine

The wolf mother growls when danger nears.
The lioness swipes when the cubs are threatened.
This is not evil.
This is wisdom.

To reclaim sacred anger is to remember this:
You are allowed to take up space. You are allowed to protect yourself. You are allowed to say no — with a growl if needed.

Reflection Prompts for Reclaiming the Fire

1. Where in your life were you taught to silence your anger?

2. Can you recall a time when your body knew something wasn’t right, but you smiled through it?

3. What does “hissing” look like for you? How can you embody it without shame?

4. What would it feel like to let your sacred rage live through you, rather than control you?

A Poem: The Hiss is Holy

I am not made only for the altar and the cradle,
but for the wild field and the thunderclap.
My blood remembers fire.
My bones remember the growl.
I will not smile at the wolf who comes for my soul.
I will bare my teeth with holy love and say: Not here. Not now. Not me.
The hiss is holy. The growl is grace. The fire is not a flaw —
It is the flame of my return.